Hey guys! I just wanted to let you all know that you can nowย comment without having an account on WordPress!ย Great right? You only need to fill out Name, email and website.

Looking forward to be able to communicate with you all โค๏ธ

Other blog posts will show under this sticky post.


Chaos, Autism, positivity and motherhood

Chaos. That’s all I can say. Chaos in real life. Chaos around everything. Emilio’s diagnose is really showing off and I’m trying to learn how to deal with it and how to be a good mom. It’s hard. Being a single mom and learning all this about Autism, how to teach my son etc. Learn sign language, fix problems and everything.. Waow! How do other moms this?! It’s crazy! I salute you!

Emilio is growing. He is healthy though. Yesterday I got a package from occupational or what it calls containing two helmets to Mio. Why? Because he bangs his head in everything especially when he gets frustrated. I will blog more about his autism and how he is developing and grows. Not only for you guys but also for myself to be able to look back and see how much my son has learned. Sounds weird I know.

Today he has worn the helmet a lot. He takes it and come to me and wants me to put it on. Yesterday it was scary for him but now he is accepting it which is great! I thought it was gonna be a massive struggle but I was wrong. He is even sleeping with it on right now ~ no it’s not closed under his chin right now. So the fact that he wants to wear the helmet is a positive thing and that’s what I’m mainly gonna focus on. Positive things. Everyone says that as well. Sounds maybe weird.. But you guys will see with time โ˜บ๏ธ

Yesterday (Thursday) Emilio and I had doctors appointment and it went well. I was super nervous because they were gonna take blood tests on him. Wow but my big boy was a very good big boy โ˜บ๏ธ I was so proud of him! After that we met up with Elim (my best friend and Emilio’s godmotherฤพ, hung out for hours. It was so much fun. Catching up. Walking around etc. No shopping though. It was hard but I did it. I’m trying to not buy so much unnecessary stuff.. Hard but I’m gonna do it. Lol.

So yeah that’s pretty much it. Chaos, autism, helmet, date with my BFF. cleaning, laundry, meetings here and there, doctors, etc. Yup everyday life for me. Lol. I’m off to bed now. Emilio will most likely be waking up soon as usual during the night time.



Trampoline, BIG MESS! And chaos!

Hello my beautiful flowers. How are you all today? I’m fine. Tired but fine โ˜บ๏ธ today has been a kinda chill / mega stressful day. Laundry. Been outside with Mio etc. One eventful thing that has happened today was, brace yourself! Emilio took the toothpaste and managed to cover the couch with it. Ohmygod. So yeah, Cleaning that one as well. Wasn’t so easy and not so fun.

What have you guys been doing today? Wait, it is still daytime at you. Ops. This timezones makes me crazy. Haha!

I’m off to bed. Sorry for a short post but it’s atleast something. Tomorrow Emilio has kindergarten /preschool so that means, waaaaking up super early. Ugh. Goodnight โค๏ธ


New start of justemmaz!

Hello everyone! Thank you so much for still being a follower and showing my blog some love. My life has been upside down lately and I’m slowly getting back up again. My blog has been suffering a lot which I hate because I love blogging and I love all of you! My english is still terrible but bear with me, hopefully one day it will get better.

Anyhow, how are you all? I’ve missed you so much! What’s new with you? Care to tell me? ๐Ÿค—

I’m back here so hopefully my routine will kick in again with blogging a lot like I used to. Also to get back to my daily life I had before ~ makeup everyday etc. I miss that. Lol! What’s new with me? Well, other than my life being flipped upside down nothing special. New clothes (ish), that’s pretty much it. Still working on “get out of my comfort zone” which is going pretty alright in my opinion. Two things that is huge when it comes to my life that has happened is Emilio has a diagnosis Autism level 3 which means it’s the hardest level of Autism. So don’t be surprised if I’m gonna blog a lot of my thoughts about that etc. It’s a whole new territory / world for me so bear with me please. Second thing is that Emilio now has insomnia medicine ~ melatonin. So I’m struggling with that at the moment as well. Other than that, nothing special.

Pointlist (easier to read)

โ–ถ Emilio has autism level 3
โ–ถ He has started with insomnia medicine
โ–ถ Lost my internship
โ–ถ Had my mom’s first anniversary of death (April 22nd was one year ago she passed away)
โ–ถ I’m gonna be an aunt again!!!!! โค๏ธ

I hope you all interact with me in the comments. Let’s chat!

Hello Spring. Finally you are here

Tomorrow it’s March 1st 2020. How insane isn’t that? Soon it’s both of my parents death day ~ March 12 and April 22.

Anyhow, no sad post here. Hello my ghosts! How are you all? God I have missed you all! For real. Even though I did blog sometimes I felt I wanted to be more active but on the same time I really had nothing to blog about. Sounds weird right? Or is it just in my head it did? Mkay.

Yesterday I worked whole day ๐Ÿ˜ช I was tired. Lack of sleep and did mostly just sat in the staff room and drew. I even got so tired at the end of my shift I fell a sleep 3 times (maybe like 3 seconds per time). How insane is that? Lol yes as you can tell… I’m exhausted ๐Ÿ˜ฉ๐Ÿ˜ฅ

Saturday whole day and night cleaning. Emilio decided to wake up in the middle of the night so after been trying for hours and hours to make him go back to sleep I fave up. He would not go to sleep! So between 3am and 3.30am I decided to do the dishes. Yup I did the dishes at that time. Afterwards I was determined to make Emilio tired and go to sleep so after a while I finally did it. He fell asleep. I went to sleep.. So good! I got 3 hours of sleep I think and at 8am I started to clean the whole apartment (almost) and I’m gonna continue tomorrow. Wish me luck LOL.

Now I’m actually are going to sleep. It’s currently 10pm here and my eyelids is burning and the back is killing. So goodnight! See you tomorrow.


Rearrange my home

Oh my God. My back is killing me. Today has been an.. Eventful day.

First my brother and I went to the doctor with Emilio ~ went great! After we came home I decided to do a big cleaning at home. Called my sister over to help me move furnitures. Normally I would do it myself but I had to move one hell off a heavy dresser from the living room to my bedroom. Emilio has figured out how to climb on top of it and smack / hit the TV so I was like “nope. That shit had to go”… In to my room.

I will show pictures when everything is done. The picture is of Emilio when he fell asleep in the car going home.

I’m so tired. Extremely short post but it’s a post ๐Ÿ˜Š I’m off to bed. Goodnight โค๏ธ


I’m back.. Again.

Oh my lord. I have been absent for a very long time. Well a lot of things has happened lately. I can’t go into details but let me tell you all like this, it’s a tornado in my head and I can’t relax. Hopefully soon I will. I have my internship / work I’m now doing 4 days a week instead of 3. Long days. I’m very tired when I come home.

Emilio is sick… Again. No surprise there. Last week I had to manage to get home somehow from my work because the daycare called. Emilio had fever. Of course!! So my sister in law came and picked me up. I went to the daycare to take Emilio home. Fever two days. Tuesday and Wednesday. Thursday to Monday (yesterday) no fever. Active and full off energy. This morning as well.. At work, all off the sudden they called.. “Emilio has fever you have to come NOW” wow. And I don’t have a driving license so I couldn’t just take a car. I had to call my brother. Took half an hour ish to come. And half an hour home..

Took Emilio, went home. Took the temperature – no fever. Went to the health care, took blood samples etc – no infection. Took temperature twice there – no fever. So annoying. So yeah that was my day. Stress, clean and sad boy.

Something has happened at the daycare but they don’t tell me because when I picked Emilio up, his arm / elbow was hurting him so bad he cried. That makes me mad.

Woh sorry a little rant. A vent moment but now I’m done.

What have you guys been up to lately? Thank you everyone who is following me and my blog. I appreciate it! I love you all!


Shopping! I’m a SuperWoman โญ

Maybe not a haul now but yes I actually did some shopping today. Don’t ask me how I managed to get all the stuff back home from the town by stroller and bus but I did ๐Ÿ’ช๐Ÿป SuperWoman!

Not the most fun shopping but very necessary! I actually spent 1000SEK which is pretty juicy but it’s fine. I managed to score some good deals ๐Ÿ’ช๐Ÿป so with me home I had 20 packages of baby whipes. 11 bottles of detergent, 6 packs of laundry thingy, 3 packages of diapers, one big box contained 4 packages of formulas.. And two bag a of cheese doodles.. Now don’t ask me how I did get it home but trust me.. I did get a lot of looks by people but I don’t care.

At the end when Emilio and I were gonna go home, we stood and waited on the bus. Emilio became cranky and all that fuss so he started to cry and scream. He wanted to cuddle with my jacket ~ my baby โค๏ธ so I gave him my jacket. Note that it was freezing cold outside but luckily I had the blanket my mom made for Emilio when he was a baby and before she passed away. Sure I got looks when I stood there waiting on the bus as well but I didn’t care at all. As long as Emilio was warm I didn’t mind.

So this has been my day. Shopping and freezing. Tomorrow it’s work day! Which means I have to get up super early ๐Ÿ˜ญ

Goodnight โญ


Mamas little helper ๐Ÿฅฐ

Today it says laundry on the schedule. Which is so needed. To be honest, I have laundry maybe two times a week but my Hooligan always makes sure I have to do it an extra time. Lol!

What are you up to? Laundry and cleaning here ๐Ÿ™‹๐Ÿปโ€โ™€๏ธ Saturday fun. Later tonight I’m gonna have a massive spa night ~ luxuriously for me. Lol!


Work, tired but happy

Hello my beautiful sunflowers ๐ŸŒป

I hope you all have / had an amazing day! I can honestly say, my day was good even though with lack of sleep. Been to work ~ ah! I love that work. Really! I work as a “take care” person at a senior home. I don’t really know what it calls but simple : I work at a senior home. The elderly people are so much fun! I feel… That I belong there!

Lacking sleep lately ~ alright. Hands down. This mama is tired! Mio has started to wake up every night now and the night to today he didn’t sleep at all.. Not the whole night. I tried E v e r y t h i n g but did he fall asleep? No ๐Ÿ˜‘๐Ÿ˜• yeah at 6am! That stress after I have woke him up! Omg!

Meeting with the boss today. Omg I was nervous. I won’t talk so much about the meeting other than I really hope this will happen ๐Ÿคž๐Ÿป crossing my fingers.

Pain everywhere. OK, lately I have had some pain in my hips and back. I do not know why and when I’m at work it’s horrible but I’m not stopping myself.. Which is good but on the same time it’s bad because now I am in bed (for the night) and can barely move ๐Ÿ˜‚ I mean, come on!!

I’m gonna try to update more often but I won’t promise that I’ll be able to do posts everyday. I’m gonna try.

Short and weird post. I had a good post on my mind to blog here but I’m so tired I almost falls asleep so I forgot it. Typical me. Anyway, I’m off to sleep! Goodnight sunflowers ๐ŸŒป๐Ÿ’›


2019 / 2020

Happy New Years! I hope you all are having an amazing celebration!

I have been thinking lately, a lot of what happened this year to me. What’s been good and what’s been bad. Plus and minus. Yay and nay. And to be honest, it’s mostly bad / minus/nay this year but there is a few good/plus/yay as well. So just to keep as a memory I wanted to share the list here. So here we go

โ€ข new job
๐Ÿ‘๐Ÿป i got a new job in February as a personal assistant
๐Ÿ‘Ž๐Ÿป lost it because of false accusations

โ€ข vacation
๐Ÿ‘๐Ÿป family time with my little family ~ Emilio and M โค๏ธ
๐Ÿ‘๐Ÿป Met Emma and her son Viggo when we were on our vacation! Finally โ™ฅ๏ธ
๐Ÿ‘Ž๐Ÿป One “hotel” we were staying at was horrible

โ€ข comfort zone
๐Ÿ‘๐Ÿป I managed to try different colors when it comes to makeup and cloths
๐Ÿ‘Ž๐Ÿป Still wear 99% black when it comes to clothes.

โ€ข makeup
๐Ÿ‘๐Ÿป I use to learn how to wear colorful makeup.
๐Ÿ‘๐Ÿป Went outside with neon green, neon red and neon blue eyebrows and eyemakeup

โ€ข new job
๐Ÿ‘๐Ÿป Senior home.
๐Ÿ‘Ž๐Ÿป Not a paid job

Other stuff
๐Ÿ‘๐Ÿป Taking care of myself much more such as having spa nights etc
๐Ÿ‘๐Ÿป Weight-loss (lost the weight I gained after mom’s death)
๐Ÿ‘Ž๐Ÿป Mama died
๐Ÿ‘Ž๐Ÿป Gained 15kg (lost them now)
๐Ÿ‘Ž๐Ÿป Still a smoker but ๐Ÿ‘๐Ÿป because it’s not as much as it used to be
๐Ÿ‘Ž๐Ÿป Separation.. No details.
๐Ÿ‘Ž๐Ÿป Christmas without mom and my other half
๐Ÿ‘๐Ÿป Been more active on Instagram ~ @ justemmaz < follow โ™ฅ๏ธ
๐Ÿ‘Ž๐Ÿป Many tears has been falling this year
๐Ÿ‘Ž๐Ÿป Still a Coca Cola zero addict but ๐Ÿ‘๐Ÿป because I’ve cut down sooo much. Still drinking to much but a lot less then before
๐Ÿ‘๐Ÿป Managed to finally fix a new ID card with my second surname.
๐Ÿ‘Ž๐Ÿป Police ~ I have not been arrested or what so ever. I just can’t talk about it now
๐Ÿ‘Ž๐Ÿป Been to the court. Witness.
๐Ÿ‘๐Ÿป Eaten a bit better ~ more green.

Probably more has happened but I can’t really remember it all now. I have also been thinking about my goals etc for 2020 and to be honest, I’m not gonna have some goals because I don’t want to disappoint myself for not achieving them but I do have some “try to make it happen” etc and it’s just some simple stuff such as

โ€ข taking care of myself better.
โ€ข Take better care of my diabetes.
โ€ข Continue to work on to get out of my comfort zone.
โ€ข Work hard to reunite the family again.
โ€ข Continue to loose weight ~ not gonna have a number to reach but as long as I lose 1kg I’m happy.
โ€ข try to get a full time job
โ€ข save some money
โ€ข get at least one tattoo this year (planning)
โ€ข visit mom and dad’s grave a bit more
โ€ข declutter my home, stuff, life, myself and things
โ€ข break free ~ something I have to work hard on.
โ€ข cut back even more on smokes and zero
โ€ข more chicken and vegetables & fruits. Less bleehh
โ€ข set some simple goals I want to try for every month.
โ€ข travel.. Even if it is just over a day to an other location (not Sundsvall or so.. Somewhere else)
โ€ข start the B with my best friend.. Hopefully..

2020 is also a year of celebrations! Many birthdays and memorial days this year such as every year but just for fun:
โ€ข 2 ~ Sister in law’s birthday
โ€ข 12 ~ 3 year anniversary
โ€ข 19 ~ husband’s birthday
โ€ข 23 ~ brother in law’s birthday
โ€ข 2 ~ Uncle’s birthday
โ€ข 5 ~ Sister C’s birthday
โ€ข 10 ~ Sister M’s birthday
โ€ข 12 ~ Dad’s death day
โ€ข 28 ~ Brother’s birthday
โ€ข 9 ~ Niece A’s birthday
โ€ข 22 ~ Mom’s death day
โ€ข 7 ~ Niece O’s birthday
โ€ข 8 ~ Mom’s birthday
โ€ข 2 ~ Niece D’s birthday
โ€ข 30 ~ Sister A & B-i-L’s wedding day
โ€ข 31 ~ Sister A’s birthday
โ€ข 14 ~ Nephew G’s birthday
โ€ข 22 ~ Dad’s birthday
โ€ข 27 ~ my 30th birthday
โ€ข 31 ~ Nephew J’s birthday
โ€ข 2 ~ Emilio’s birthday


So that was a little bit. I’ll try become better at blogging as well! I truly miss blogging and I miss you guys! But lately my life has been so crazy! On one day it turned a 360. I have had barely any chance to just catch my breathe. It’s been meetings here and there. Every where and near. Ugh hopefully 2020 will be a lot calmer. Happy new year! Thank you everyone for this year and thank you all for the love you have given me. I love you all! โ™ฅ๏ธโ™ฅ๏ธ